Joslyn James: Erotic Royalty

Joslyn James is an adult industry superstar and legend having worked in the space for 2 decades. She exudes a calm and focused energy- a woman about her business who prioritizes her family. I photographed Joslyn when she visited NYC for the launch party of the new issue of Petit Mort magazine where she was featured as a cover girl - you can buy that issue here. You can buy the issue here! We did a photo shoot themed ‘Bombshell in her Boudoir’ and I interview her later about how she balances life as a legendary hot girl in a stigmatized industry. Joslyn’s insights as a sex worker and self actualized sex symbol inspire me greatly. Read on!

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Leo Brooklyn: I’m so fascinated by your longevity as a sex worker and how you’ve evolved over the years in this space. I know that you are in full mommy mode these days with your new little one. What does a typical morning look like for you and your children? Are you an early riser?

Joslyn James: I usually wake up somewhere between 4 and 6 a.m.—it really depends on what we have going on that day. If I get to 'sleep in,' that means until six! Mornings are a whirlwind: breakfast, wrapping up any chores we didn’t finish the night before, packing lunches, sorting clothes. Then I get the baby up and feed her. She doesn’t just have milk anymore—she has a smoothie and a full breakfast—then we do bath time and get her dressed. After that, she usually goes down for a morning nap, and my 9 year old heads off to school or camp.

Then it’s on to my other jobs. It's not just adult industry work—I also co-run a business that offers DMV services, and we’re working on becoming an authorized U-Haul vendor. On top of that, I’m ordained in the state of Nevada and I officiate weddings, and I’m about to become a notary as well. I like having a full plate!

Leo: I’ve noticed you’re often announcing tours on your Instagram stories, which makes me wonder how you manage things at home while you’re traveling. Is your partner able to stay home with the kids, or do you have a full-time nanny to help out?

Joslyn: We plan our schedules around whether or not I’m going out of town. The first question is always, “Is Mommy traveling?” and then we figure out what needs to be in place so things run smoothly at home. My husband stays with the kids while I’m away. If I’m gone for a week, I usually arrange for someone to come by and help tidy up, just to take some pressure off. I’ll also have someone give him a break for a few hours—three or four, usually—so he can step out and handle things he can’t really do with the kids in tow.

Leo: I’d love to talk a bit about the kind of sex work you do while you're on tour—if you're comfortable sharing, would you be open to chatting about that?

Joslyn: When I’m on tour, I see people for private time—and what that involves really depends on the client. A lot of it tends to be roleplay or fetish-based. Nothing too out there, really. The main theme I get asked for is the MILF thing, which has followed me throughout my career—not just in my private sessions, but also in adult films and the industry at large.

I actually got into porn at 27, back in 2005, and even though I looked super young—like late teens—they immediately put me in the MILF category. At the time, 27 was considered "old" for a new performer. I didn’t even have breast implants yet, and I definitely didn’t look like a mom, but they were like, “Well, this is the only category you really fit into.” I remember thinking, Okay... I guess this is just how it works.

It was also funny because I only had four small tattoos when I started, and even that felt like a big deal. People acted like it was this huge obstacle—like, “What are we going to do with you and all these tattoos?” Now you look at the industry and there’s a whole genre for tattooed and alternative performers. They even have entire award categories for alt models with heavy body modifications. So it’s wild to think how much things have changed since I started—and how what once felt like a limitation has now become a whole aesthetic.

Leo: Wow- you’ve seen so many changes in the industry.

Joslyn: Absolutely. And now, almost 20 years later, you can look at me and see how much has changed—my look is totally different, and none of that has stopped me from working. In fact, I’m working more independently now than I ever was before. Back then, all those voices made me believe I only had a short window in this industry. Needless to say, they were wrong. And most of those agencies? They don’t even exist anymore.

Leo: Can you share something you really love about being a sex worker?

Joslyn: One of the things I love most about being a sex worker is helping people feel safe and comfortable enough to express themselves—whether that means exploring a sexual fantasy, fulfilling a desire, or just trying something new for the first time. I’ve always made it a priority to create a safe space, not just for myself and my clients, but also for anyone I’m collaborating with in the industry.

I let people know from the start: you never have to do anything you don’t want to do. Even if something was your idea and you get in the moment and realize you’re not comfortable—that’s totally okay. I’m the first one to say, “Let’s pause. Do we need to talk about it? Do you want to stop or adjust something?” I really believe in checking in and making sure everyone feels supported. That’s just who I’ve always been, both in my work and in life in general.

Because of that, I’ve become someone people often come to for their “firsts”—whether it’s a new kink, a fantasy they’ve never shared, or something they can’t explore with their partner. I have a reputation for making people feel safe, heard, confident, and comfortable. And honestly, the things people are afraid to explore often aren’t that “weird” at all. In the grand scheme of things, what’s considered “weird” is usually just misunderstood.

Leo: I came into sex work with 18 years of regular dating experience, and honestly, I fell in love with this world because of how much communication it involves. There’s such a strong focus on consent, clear boundaries, and open discussion. It was such a contrast to what I was used to. Everything felt more intentional- that level of honesty and respect was refreshing.

What I’ve come to deeply appreciate is how sex workers truly understand boundaries, communication, and consent—all the things people should be taught but often aren’t. So many people grow up without any real guidance around those basics, and yet in sex work, they’re foundational. It’s eye-opening how much emotional intelligence and care goes into this work—things that are often missing in so-called “normal” relationships.

Leo: What does an ideal client look like for you at this point in your life and career?

Joslyn: Most of my clients have been with me for years. I rarely see one-time visitors. If I see someone once, chances are I’ll see them again—and again. I call them “one-night stand clients,” and honestly, I can’t say I’ve ever really had those.

I know that for a lot of providers, especially in a city like Vegas, it's common to have a constant rotation of people coming in and out. But even though Vegas has that reputation, my experience has been different. I’ve had clients tell me they’re coming to town a year in advance. Some will plan their trips around my tour schedule. I’ve even had people drive four to six hours just to see me—one client drove all the way from South Carolina to meet me in Atlanta. That kind of consistency and dedication really means a lot.

I love it! I'm always like, Wait, from where? But at the same time, I try not to ask too many personal questions—everyone has their own situation, and I never want to make someone feel uncomfortable or put on the spot.

That client I saw in Atlanta, for example—I had no idea he had moved to South Carolina. I had seen him a few times back when he lived in Atlanta, and then all of a sudden he tells me, “Oh yeah, I drove up from South Carolina to see you.” I was like, Wow, okay! It really makes me feel special when someone goes out of their way like that.

Leo: It makes sense though—you’re offering something truly unique. No one else can deliver exactly what you do, because no one else is you. Your vibe, your energy—it’s one of a kind.

Joslyn: For me, an ideal client is someone who respects boundaries—period. It’s not just about having a conversation about limits, it’s about actually hearing them and honoring them. I don’t want it to go in one ear and out the other just because someone’s caught up in the heat of the moment.

I had one client I had to ask to leave because he didn’t listen the first two times I stated a boundary. I told him, “Sir, I’m going to need you to get dressed and leave. I’ll give you your money back—because it is what it is.” He tried to offer me more money, but that’s not how I work. If you can’t listen and show respect, you don’t get to stay in my space.

I get that passion happens. The heat of the moment is real. But in my space, that’s not an excuse. If you don’t respect my boundaries, I won’t respect yours—and trust me, you don’t want that. I’ve had to put it plainly before: “Do you like surprise anal? Because I don’t.”

When clients hear that, they usually say, “Of course not.”
Exactly. So there’s this thing called listening and respecting boundaries. Let’s just keep it simple and play nice. That’s when things go beautifully. Otherwise… it can go very poorly.

Leo: It’s so refreshing to hear your strong sense of self and how firmly you hold your boundaries—as a grown woman, and as someone clearly intelligent, experienced, and powerful. I think especially in this industry, that kind of clarity and confidence is everything.

Joslyn: You’ve got to keep yourself safe, and you’ve got to keep your client safe too. If no one’s paying attention to safety—physical, emotional, all of it—then things are bound to go wrong. It’s that simple.

Leo: Can you tell me about a specific scene or experience with a client that you really enjoyed recently?

Joslyn: I’ve had so many memorable personal experiences, but the ones I really enjoy are when someone is trying something for the first time. A client will say, “Remember when I told you I wanted to explore you being my mommy or whatever? I’ll be like, okay, yeah. And they're like, okay, I'm ready. I’ll be like so how mommy do you want me to be? Do you want me to sneak into your bed? Do you want me to suck your pp? Like what do you want me to do? A lot of the time, it’s about role reversal. These are men who are used to being in charge in their daily lives—CEOs, business owners, people constantly making decisions—and they just want a break from that. They want to be taken care of, told what to do, maybe even punished a little.

It can range from anything from paddling them to them pretending to nurse me. Whatever it is, it’s always fully consensual. And what I’ve found is that when people are carrying fantasies or desires that they’re afraid to express, I can help them explore those in a space that’s grounded in trust and respect. 

And like I said anytime where it's the age play, if I'm stopping them from acting out something that could be dangerous or unsafe-  I’m able to help them get whatever it is out of their system, and I’m able to help them not cause harm. Helping someone feel seen and accepted for who they are, without shame—that’s incredibly meaningful to me.

Leo: What you’re doing is definitely therapeutic. You are an angel and you are literally bestowing the gift of sexy pleasure upon the world. Your body is absolutely stunning, and I have so much respect for the way you move through the world with such an aesthetically powerful presence. It takes a certain kind of self-possession to not care about people’s reactions—to be unapologetically yourself. What was the motivation, or the emotional or artistic drive behind it?

Joslyn: It all started with my lips. I inherited my dad’s full bottom lip and my mom’s barely-there top lip, so at first I was just balancing things out—adding filler to the top to match the bottom. But I always loved that full, plush “Barbie” look, like the kind of lips you see on an actual doll. That’s when I started doing full syringes. After about six months, I’d usually go back for another because my body metabolizes filler really quickly, especially when I’m spending time in humid climates like the Carolinas, Florida, or Texas. I’ve noticed the same thing with my Botox too—I get it for migraines, and the effect fades faster in humidity. So upkeep is part aesthetic, part medical.

As for my breasts, this journey goes back to 2005. It’s taken years of surgeries to get to this particular size, and it hasn’t been easy. I had complications along the way, including a serious infection in my left breast a few years ago. It was life-threatening, and if I hadn’t had emergency surgery, I might not be here. It happened early in my recovery from addiction, and some doctors dismissed me, assuming I just wanted pain meds. But that wasn’t even my drug of choice—and I never asked for pills. I was asking for help. Eventually I found a doctor who actually listened and helped save my life.

After that, it became about rebuilding—making sure my breasts were healthy enough to eventually size up. What I have now is 1800ccs, which most people think is extreme, but for me, this is just the beginning. I want to go bigger. I actually just had a consultation with Dr. Rivas, and he said my goals are totally achievable. We’ll see what happens after my next baby—pregnancy always changes your body, so who knows what my boobs will do next?

Leo: Congrats on planning on your next baby!

Joslyn: Yeah, we’re planning for May next year—that’s the goal for embryo transfer month. We’re hoping everything aligns for that.

And then, you know, after I got sober, like a lot of people, I gained weight. It mostly went to my butt, thighs, and back. But I was able to do a fat transfer, which was a great option. Most people in that situation would do a BBL, but my doctor was like, “Actually, we can put the fat into your breasts instead,” and I said, “Yes, please.”

So I ended up with about 1200ccs of fat transferred into each boob, which helped not only with volume but also encouraged my body to build its own breast tissue. Pregnancy helped with that too—my boobs got much bigger during that time. And my doctor confirmed that kind of growth could only happen with real breast tissue, which was really affirming to hear.

So at this point, my breasts aren’t just implants—they’re a mix of implant, fat transfer, and my own tissue. That’s definitely reassuring as I think about the next phase of my breast journey. It makes me feel more confident about going even bigger when the time comes.

Leo: How has modifying your body influenced your experience as a sex worker—either in how clients respond to you, how you navigate the work, or how you feel in your own skin while doing it?

Joslyn: They paid for themselves in three days—amazing. And I’m not just talking about the surgery itself, but everything afterward too: the post-op treatments, hyperbaric oxygen therapy, IV drips, red light therapy, the whole recovery process. I recouped the entire investment, plus some, in just three days.

That was a fun call to make to my doctor. I was like, “Doc, you’re not gonna believe this—I already made back the money and more.” He laughed and said, “Well, that’s gotta be a record.” And honestly, they’re the gift that keeps on giving. People are already contributing to the fund for the next set. It’s wild—and kind of beautiful.

Leo: That’s so freaking awesome. What’s something you love about moving through the world now, in this body, compared to before? I imagine it’s a completely different experience—physically and emotionally.

Joslyn: With this body, I’m finally in the body I want—not the one someone else wanted me to have. Yes, my husband loves everything I’ve done—the hair transplant, the facelift, the lips, the boobs, the tan—he’s all about it. But the key is that I love it. That’s what really matters.

Leo: Something I’m curious to ask sex workers about is your own relationship to sexuality and desire. Would you say your sex drive is higher than average? And how has that shaped or contributed to your work in this field?

Joslyn: I wouldn’t say I’ve always had a super high sex drive, like I’m not horny all the time or anything. But when I am in the moment? Oh yeah—I’m fully present, and I’m getting mine. I have multiple orgasms every single time. That’s just how I’ve always operated. It’s not about constant desire—it’s about being fully embodied and being all about getting mine in the moment. 

Leo:  What do you think helped you feel so confident owning your pleasure and your body?
Have you always felt that way, or did it grow over time?

Joslyn James: Honestly, just masturbating for a long time and getting it down to a science. At this point, I don’t really have to think about it—my orgasms just happen once things get going. It’s not always some huge explosion, but it doesn’t have to be. It still feels good.

And growing up in a house full of sisters with just one bathroom? You had to be quick. So I learned early on how to figure it out fast and make it work.

Leo: I know you have three children— I’d love to hear more about your experience of motherhood and how you relate to your kids.How would you teach your child what it means to be a powerful woman?

Joslyn:  Your voice matters. It’s okay to be mad—but it’s not okay to be mean. Set your boundaries, and respect other people’s too. You won’t always get what you want when you want it, but you’ll always have what you need.

Leo: How does motherhood feel to you right now?

Joslyn: It’s funny—my whole life, the only things I ever really wanted to be were a mom and a Rockette. But being a Rockette comes with a height requirement, and, well… being a mom doesn’t. So motherhood has always been something I deeply wanted.

If it were entirely up to me, I’d probably have a lot more kids than I do now. But, you know, the universe has its own plan—God, fate, all those powers that be. Still, I’m incredibly grateful and happy for the children I do have. They’re everything.

Leo:  How did you meet your partner and what made you know that they were the one?

Joslyn: We actually met on set in Los Angeles about 15 years ago—we were just pals back then. Then during COVID, after not seeing each other for maybe 9 or 10 years, we reconnected. And it was just the right time. From that point on, it’s been a journey, but a really beautiful one. Nothing truly worth having comes easy—and that’s been the story of my life.

Anything meaningful takes work. And when it comes to relationships, it can’t be one-sided. If you really want to be in a partnership, you have to be willing to be selfless. A lot of people don’t want to compromise or take accountability, but those things are necessary. A healthy relationship is give and take.

You’ll have good days and bad days. You won’t always see eye to eye. But you both have to be willing to step back and take space when needed—so you can stay respectful and not say things in the heat of the moment that you’ll have to apologize for later.

We have to teach our kids how to be emotionally intelligent and emotionally safe—not just physically. They need to see that emotional needs matter just as much, and that it’s okay to take care of those parts of ourselves and each other.

Leo: How do you define success for yourself right now?

Joslyn: To me, success is raising happy, healthy human beings and having a loving, stable home with my partner and kids. It’s also having a strong, healthy body—so I can keep showing up for my family, and also make money and take care of us all. That’s what it’s really about.

Leo: I’d love to ask you about addiction, because I know you’ve come through that journey and conquered so much. What advice would you give to someone who’s trying to overcome their addiction—especially in those early, most challenging moments?

Joslyn: It’s going to be scary, and it’s going to be hard—but it’s also going to be so worth it. You’ll have moments that open your eyes and remind you why you’re doing it. Recovery is 100% terrifying and 100% worth it.

You’re going to cry, laugh, scream, get angry, feel joy, sadness—sometimes all at once. And that’s okay. It’s okay to feel 17 different things at the same time. Growing up, healing, becoming who you’re meant to be—it’s confusing and it’s hard. You won’t always get the answers you want. But recovery isn’t just about “moving on.” It’s about learning to say: I can’t change that—and that’s okay.

And honestly, a lot of the things you’re holding onto? They probably have nothing to do with you in the first place. Letting go is part of healing.

Leo: How does sobriety feel?

Joslyn: It feels amazing to be fully present—in all ways. Even on the hard days, even in the difficult moments when something emotionally triggers me, I’ve learned to say: It’s okay to be triggered. It’s okay to feel it. For me, the most important part is asking myself why that moment still has such a strong effect on me.

A lot of times, it’s because I never got the closure or the answers I needed to feel okay in that moment. Some days I’m better at accepting that than others. Some days I think, Well, my parents weren’t equipped. What could I do? And now that they’re gone, I know I’ll never get the answers I wanted—and honestly, even if they were still here, they probably wouldn’t be able to give me what I needed.

So I remind myself: That wasn’t about me. That was their thing. People can’t be different if they were never taught how. And that’s been one of the biggest lessons for me—learning to be okay with the fact that it wasn’t okay. And knowing that I can choose to respond differently now. I can create a different life for myself, for my kids, and for my partner. I’m not bound to what I grew up in.